What I have Lived for

"Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind. These passions, like great winds, have blown me hither and thither, in a wayward course, over a great ocean of anguish, reaching to the very verge of despair.

I have sought love, first, because it brings ecstasy - ecstasy so great that I would often have sacrificed all the rest of life for a few hours of this joy. I have sought it, next, because it relieves loneliness--that terrible loneliness in which one shivering consciousness looks over the rim of the world into the cold unfathomable lifeless abyss. I have sought it finally, because in the union of love I have seen, in a mystic miniature, the prefiguring vision of the heaven that saints and poets have imagined. This is what I sought, and though it might seem too good for human life, this is what--at last--I have found.

With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway above the flux. A little of this, but not much, I have achieved.

Love and knowledge, so far as they were possible, led upward toward the heavens. But always pity brought me back to earth. Echoes of cries of pain reverberate in my heart. Children in famine, victims tortured by oppressors, helpless old people a burden to their sons, and the whole world of loneliness, poverty, and pain make a mockery of what human life should be. I long to alleviate this evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer.

This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly live it again if the chance were offered me."

Excerpts form 'Prologue', Autobiography, by Bertrand Russell

In Memorium: Yash Chopra

Yash Chopra's filmography in DVDs, barring the to be released Jab Tak Hai Jaan, collected gradually, from bit-by-savings, over a period of time, with lots of love and affection...

a part of my cherished romance will never be the same again...

This is the video, flawed but intensely honest, that I carved over a period of seven years filling each frame with my intense love and awe of your screen romance, that I never got to share with you in person...

बापू की अंतिम यात्रा

भूमंडल से नभमंडल तक चहुँओर अंधेरा छाया
कर्णधार ही चले गए किसने यह गान सुनाया 

नहीं जानता था कोई कब काल यहाँ पर आया 

धिक्कार है उसको जिसने बापू पर हाथ चलाया 

मेरी किस्मत में आग लगी, औरों की किस्मत फूट गयी 

अपने ही हाथों से हाए, बापू पर गोली छूट गयी 

वह बांध अहिंसा का भारी, मेरे सन्मुख ही टूट गया 

वह प्रेम भरा गागर भी मेरा, आज वहीं पर फूट गया 

गोली थी बापू के सीने पर, या थी अपने ही त्राता पर 

गोली बापू पर नहीं, चली भारत के भाग्य विधाता पर 

उनके सीने से रक्त गिरा, या आहों से भरी फुंकार गिरी 

उस देवदूत के सीने से, हरि वीणा की झनकार गिरी 

वह देवों से भी बढ़कर था, वह निर्धन जन का भी धन था 

जनता की करुण पुकार बना, वह जीवन का भी जीवन था 

वह एक धेय से आया था, बस नाव हमारी खेने को 

पुण्य पिलाने, सत्य बांटने, अस्त्र अहिंसा देने को 

बन पीड़ितों की पुकार चला, हरिजन का बन आधार चला 

डगमग नैय्या थी डोल रही, बनकर वह खेवनहार चला 

आजादी की अम्बुधि उठने से, निकल पड़ा विष का प्याला 

पीना वाला था कोई नहीं, बापू ने उसको पी डाला 

आज़ादी का आगमन हुआ, पर हम अपने ही छले गए 

इस बीच भंवर में नैय्या को तज बापू मेरे चले गए 

करता था हुंकार कभी तो शत्रु शिविर भहराता था 

था तो दुबला पतला ही पर भूमंडल भी थर्राता था 

आंचल पसार माँ मांग रही अपने उस बापू प्यारे को 

भिक्षा में फिर देदो भगवन मेरे उस एक सहारे को 

- निर्मल कुमार सिन्हा

This piece was penned by my grandfather long ago, when he used to love writing poetry and also had the leisure to do so! This is the first time this piece has been documented (it's still in its incomplete form though), as until now he used to quote this from his memory for our listening pleasure. If only I could lay my hands on some other of his poems! I feel so proud and humbled in letting my small personal blog space have the honor of putting my grandfather's close-to-heart works; you mean a lot to all of us in the family, Dadaji; I am just not good enough in wording all those overwhelming emotions. Please accept this as my small and unassuming tribute to you...

P.S. Any mistake in form of mis-spelled words, missing punctuations, etc. arise out of my own incompetence in understanding of the language.

Artificial Intelligence: A.I.

"Cirrus, Socrates, particle, decibel, hurricane, dolphin, tulip"

Watched Spielberg’s masterpiece: Artificial Intelligence: A.I., yesterday evening. i use the word 'masterpiece' not in the sense a film critic would use, rather a viewer deeply affected by the movie would use to imply. By the way, it's also a first for me to use that word to describe my experience of a movie; no Spielberg movie had yet affected me as much… On a rather lesser level, it also reminded me of the movie 'Rani Aur Lalpari', involving an almost similar desire of a girl to find Lal pari (Red fairy), that i had so loved as a child (but, was bored of it when i tried to gavi it a re-watch a few months ago; beginning of the end of innocence?)...

i had discovered earlier about myself, i think, i am easily most affected (positively) by innocence, and love, not necessarily in that order. i didn't have an inkling as to which of them affected me the most, i had given the benefit of doubt to love. However, after this movie, i am having second thoughts on that, in favour of innocence...


Post-watch, i was left with such a pacific, meditative peace and calm with myself, and at the same time in such an awe of the 'innocence' and the sage like 'perseverance’ of the mecha boy: David (does this name imply any Biblical significance?), that i still have that tranquil hangover this next evening too…




"Blue fairy! Please make me a 'real' boy!"



That apart, it also did lead me to some instant random questions, representing and arising out of my current unorganised state of thoughts on this issue of natural v/s artificial life, i need find answers to, to enable me make more sense of the issue. So here some of the basic ones go:

• How do we scientifically define ‘life’ and/or 'intelligence' (as opposed to finding such definitions rooted in religion and theology)?
• What are the necessary and sufficient conditions to define and characterise life and/or intelligence?
• 'Artificial' just an innocent prefix indicative only of the creator of life or intelligence (nature or humans and/or machines), or does it imply more?

Answers to these below mentioned ones can probably be found in answers to the above questions:

• Any system then takes an input, has the power & resources to processes it, and reacts to the input (to give an output) be called an elementary form of life and/or intelligence (a crude example being any simple computer program)?
• While attempting a simulation of life, at what point the simulation ceases to be one, and becomes an artificially created life?
• An amoeba be called an instance of life, while even a super toy from A.I. not?

Obviously, as it can be seen, many of these questions wouldn't have been there in the first place, had i had the least bit exposure to studying artificial intelligence in pursuit of my curiosity. However, i do hope to make a start...

P.S.
Detective Del Spooner: Human beings have dreams. Even dogs have dreams, but not you, you are just a machine. An imitation of life. Can a robot write a symphony? Can a robot turn a... canvas into a beautiful masterpiece? 
Sonny (an advanced robot): Can you?

(I, Robot)

The Bucket List

The Bucket List: 1. Witness something truly majestic

"It is difficult to understand the sum of a person's life; some people will tell you it is measured by the ones left behind; some believe it can be measured in faith; some say by love; other folks say, life has no meaning at all. Me? I believe that you measure yourself by the people who measure themselves by you...

Even now, I can't claim to understand the measure of a life, but i can tell you this: I know, when he died, his eyes were closed, and his heart was open..."

Carter Chambers

this one is for you, Jim

Jim Dial, and Murphy Brown

"When you are so low, that you can't remember what happy feels like; when you are so scared, that sleep is a distant memory, and smiling is a forgotten art; when being sad is as natural as breathing; then you go (to join a support group, while battling against breast cancer). Until then, I am here for you."

Jim Dial, to colleague and close friend, Murphy Brown

P.S. Murphy Brown, Episode 10x13 Turpis Capillis Annus

The Truman Show

"We accept the reality of the world with which we are presented."

Christof, to Truman

Take an overnight of mind draining work till 6-7 in the morning, add to it some 5 hrs of scant sleep (yes, 8 hrs is my niche), a supposedly healthy lunch further badly cooked, followed by a whole afternoon of college classes that you are left no choice but to attend wearily so that the attendance percentages don't dip below a certain minimum, with some nagging mind intensive work in evening as a garnish, to cook up your mind to such desperation, that it cries for that elusive uninterrupted 12 hrs of pacific sleep, and yet cannot have because even though the mind is tired, it's still irritatingly active and anything but feeling drowsy..

Now, where to bury the frustration.. a sitcom episode of the current favourite Murphy Brown.. okay, finished the 225th episode.. it was the usual good sarcastic laugh, but needed something more, as watching straight 80-90 episodes had built up an unavoidable monotony and i needed a season break! Cut-to, i remember promising a friend to watch his recommended movie today.. okay, can give it a try.. shouldn't hurt, even though i am usually wary of watching good recommended movies, (read profound) threatening to overburden the already mentally exhausted state with more layers and quantities of impactful and/or provocative thoughts, i decided to go with this movie called 'The Truman Show' (hadn't heard of it earlier, and what did the name indicate about the movie, i wondered?), for the sole reason of seeing Jim Carrey as the leading man.. it seemed a safe and light package...
Some 2 hrs later...

Well, what do i say about this one.. Simply put it, it's a kind of unique movie (yes, it did burden the already burdened mind, but in a refreshingly positive way) i haven't watched in a long, long time, and deservedly, it shows up in the list of 'Must Watch ( unique) Movies Before You Die', at the 'Cinema is Forever!' blog post, a definite place to be for all cinema lovers, at http://cinemaisforever.blogspot.com. And, in case you were wondering whatever happened to all that sulking, well, as a friend of mine put it, "good cinema is therapeutic!", and i can surely tell you now, i couldn't agree any more!

You want more reasons to watch the film? Well, be my guest and follow the link, but better still, head straight for the movie, and save the link for post watch..

It's time out for these pleasures of mind now. Over to some pleasures of the taste. Time to hopefully get the first decent meal of the day, and hopefully follow it up with that sleep thing i was talking about earlier, as a another friend of mine recently wished me well, "may slumber soothe us all..."

:)